I WENT TO A THEATER to see the latest Ridley Scott “masterpiece,” Napoleon, on the big screen. I am a very big fan of Scott’s because he did Bladerunner and so many other great films. And as an enormous fan of Joaquin Phoenix who played the lead, it was hard not to have the greatest expectations going in. After two hours, I only stayed because I wanted to “see” the history and the ending. I still didn’t make it all the way.

Even great directors meet their Waterloo as Napoleon did. Scott made an epic film that transported viewers more than two centuries back in time. The quality of the backdrop was excellent as expected. There were two major flaws, however, that spoiled it for me.

The first flaw was simply that the film had a clunky structure. How do you tell the story of such a dominant figure in European history?

–Do you tell it through the eyes of someone who was there (The Great Gatsby or Shawshank Redemption)? Might you focus more intently on a specific year or two (as with Lincoln)?

No. Just build and follow a timeline and shoot most of the good battles.

Clunk.

The second flaw was worse. It hurts to announce that one of my favorite actors, Joaquin Phoenix, failed to convince me he was Napoleon Bonaparte. First off, surrounded by a terrific cast–many Brits among them–his American accent sounded counterfeit. Secondly, his character came off as timid and mousy at times–normal on one level where everyone has vulnerability, yet hardly how you would portray a decisive future emperor! At times he had the bearing and temperament of a famous general and head of state.  Too often, though, his muttered, soft-spoken lines (evoking past character roles) made me cringe.

You can watch it for the panorama, the history, and the spellbinding performance by Vanessa Kirby, who played Josephine. Unfortunately, the boughs of your brain will break if they try overhard to suspend disbelief and  pretend throughout the film that the main character is really Napoleon.

WRH